As I sat in church this Sunday listening to the message of “Finding Joy in the Darkness,” tears filled my eyes. Our family’s Christmas card read, “Joy to the World!” but this joy we proclaimed felt elusive. We had just learned days before that our five-month-old kitten, Mystic, had a rare virus and only days to live. We consulted research journals and animal experts, but all hope was lost.
When Monday came, the air hung heavy, and Mystic suffered. We pulled the kids from school and went together to the vet’s office, giving Mystic endless snuggles and love. We anointed her body with fragrant oil, recited a blessing, read scriptures and sang a song from Les Miserables as she faded out of this life:
Mystic we bless your name;
Mystic lay down your burdens;
You filled our lives with love;
Now you will be with God.
Tears streamed down our faces as we placed our sweet kitten into the cold earth, huddled together and holding each other’s grief. Our hearts felt hollow, the faith we proclaimed through gritted teeth was riddled in doubt, but there was a tragic beauty in these moments that washed over us in waves of gentle comfort. And in this comfort, we clung to hope. We chose “joy-notwithstanding.”
Over the previous weeks, the kids and I had fittingly memorized a quote by William Shakespeare:
“Sweet are the uses of adversity which, like the toad, ugly and venomous, wears yet a precious jewel in his head.”
Could something good emerge from this tragedy? A deeper love among us? A hard-won compassion for others? Whatever ugly and venomous toad you carry in your pocket, could God also make of it a jewel of virtue, a resurrection crown?
Our mourning is still thick and heavy, our sadness overwhelming. But we cling to hope that, for our Mystic, all is well… and that in our lives, too, all manner of things shall be made well, our sadness will turn to joy-notwithstanding, and we will laugh again.
Mystic, you are a part of our forever family.
We'll always remember:
the way you squeaked (squeaky-squeaky!)
how you jumped into the bathtub and toilet
the way you purred around our necks on the lawnchairs
how you slept with the kids and licked their faces with your sandpaper tongue to wake them
the way you pounced and trotted around like a little queen
your snuggles with bunny and Climber, who always hugged you with their paws
No one will ever replace you. We love you!
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